Sunday, February 15, 2009

Follow the Bread Crumbs

I just finished working my radio station's annual radiothon to benefit children here in the Twin Cities.  We raise money for two very special organizations that help children with cancer and disabilities.  As I was interviewing different parents I was reminded of one very special mother that I had met last year.  Her name is Theresa Lao.  She had two little boys with a condition that caused their skin to shed off of their bodies.  When I met her there was no cure for this condition known as EB.  Yet, she continued fighting and petitioning for her sons and finally found Dr. Waggoner at the U of M Fairview Children's Hospital who was willing to try to find a cure.  She moved her two sons out to MN from NJ and lived in a hotel so that they could be part of a medical trial that just might work.

One of my questions to her was this, "How did you know the next 'right' thing to do for your children...How did you know what your next step would be?"  Her answer was simple, "God always gives me the bread crumbs and I just have to follow them."  She was referring to the Hansel and Gretel story and it made a visual impression on me that stuck.  I met her in the Fall of '07 not knowing how my life would change that following Spring.  That Spring I would find out that my daughter had autism.  I have so often thought of Theresa and I have taken the 'breadcrumbs' piece of advice to heart.  Whenever I wonder if I am doing all that I can for Aleks and question what I should be doing next, I think of the breadcrumbs.  I have found that God truly does give us breadcrumbs of knowledge.  He'll use someone else to mention something that is working for them, I'll then get an email about it or have a second person mention it and then it hits me that this is a breadcrumb moment.  I have found that He'll keep giving me the breadcrumbs, but that it is my job to follow up on them.  It is also my job as the mom of a child with ASD to be aware and open to wherever God is leading us.  

My advice to parents struggling with the question of 'What next?' is this, look for the breadcrumbs.  Just be prepared that they may not be where you thought they would be and they may not be what you expected at all.  You may also be surprised at who God uses to show you a breadcrumb.

Blessings-

Melissa

2 comments:

mnbarns said...

I remember her story and it was very touching. You are right that opportunities will arise in the strangest places and we just always have to be open and willing to take a chance every now and then. From someone on the [autism] spectrum, and a loyal listener of KS95 I have followed your blog with interest. Thanks for keeping us in the loop!

G

Shannon Taglieber-Brunson said...

Hi Melissa,

I was listening the day that you sent Aleks to preschool for the first day and then listened when you said she had autism. I was on my way to Children's hospital in St Paul to take my son Colin to speech. He at the time, was 3 and also was just diagnosed with Autism. I sat in the car in the parking garage and listened as you struggled to talk about it. I teared up and just hugged on my little guy. Your story, so closely matching ours. We had just moved to Minnesota in March and thought that there was something not quite right about Colin. I was on a 4 month waiting list to get him diagnosed, but canceled the appointment when we found out we were going to move. I got in within two weeks here and found out he has moderate to severe autism. What a blow to the stomach. I quickly imagined him never going to a "normal" school, or getting married. It was so hard for us to accept. So as I was sitting there crying, Colin looked at me with those big brown eyes and said "You ok mommy?" I of course tried to hug him harder and wipe away the tears. I just wanted to let you know that I stand behind you in trying to find out what is best for her. I am not sure if you have tried ABA therapy, but it has literally turned Colin around. I listen to your show as much as I can, hoping that you will suggest another idea that we haven't googled, or heard of before. Thanks for bringing attention to Autism.

We are also doing the Steps of Hope Walk in Minnetonka on March 1st. Not sure if you have heard of it, but maybe you could mention it on your show!

Thanks so much!
Shannon